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Posted by Rob Sherwood Friday, 2008-August-29 14:49 Disney would probably sue, but the Minnesota State Fair is the Happiest Place On Earth. Maybe they will escape the lawsuit with a sign that says...."One of the Happiest Places on Earth". Or maybe....."The Third Happiest Place on Earth". (Anaheim AND Orlando) If you are a regular reader of this scree you might remember I missed the Fair last year. The entire month of September and a good portion of October were spent in a funk. Even when they prescribed Librium-On-A-Stick...I didn't get better until I had gone through all the stages of grief. This year is different. I got my Fair-Fix and life is good. But...what is good at the fair isn't necessarily good AFTER the fair. Frozen Pronto Pups look like sex toys. In fact, I have watched the frozen food department at Cub and everyone I saw buying frozen Pronto Pups were shopping for sex toys. You can tell. And what about Aunt Martha's Chocolate Chip Cookies. Grabbing a bucket of cookies ($14!) and getting supine under the glutton spigot at the all-you-can-drink milk booth and you have a little vision of Heaven. But once you walk under that "3rd Happiest Place On Earth" sign, they are programmed to go just a little off. They pile them high in that bucket and my nephew scrunched them down while still warm and hot. This meant that when I finally opened the bucket instead of a bucket of cookies I had one big cookie chunk about the size of a small boulder. I was able to peel off a few cookies but ended up slamming the whole thing into the sink to break it apart. I ended up with a sink full of Aunt Martha's Cookie Crumbs and even when I scooped them up with a spoon while the old lady from next door stood on a footstool and poured milk into my mouth from a half-gallon of 1%...it just wasn't the same. For the record, I had my obligatory Creme Puff, Bull Bites, Gyro, Pronto Pup, and scarfed some onion rings and cheese curds from others, and 4 or 5 diet Pepsi's. With the Double Cheese from McDonalds in North Branch on the way home, my Lipitor and Plavix worked over-time and the next day I only need 3 nitros to control the chest pain. Anyway....it is good to be home and I have stories to share. Which I will over the next week. I will also finish the next chapters in the never-ending-story. And... the forest will echo with laughter..... Rob PS: Suddenly I am reminded of the Asparagus Festival in Stockton CA, the Western Washington Fair in Pullayup, WA and various other "fair-lite" events I have enjoyed. AAAAAh......so many DAMN stories.......so little time..... Post reply
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